I’M A HOMESCHOOL MOM WITH LIMITED PATIENCE

Dear mom, the one who thinks I have this homeschooling thing and parenting thing altogether, the one who thinks I am full of sunshine and patience.  The mother who said, “homeschooling? I could never homeschool my kids, I don’t have the patience for that!” It’s ok, this is the first thing most moms say to me when I tell them I homeschool my kids.

When you said this to me, all I did was nod and smile but, here’s what I really wanted to tell you.

I’M A HOMESCHOOL MOM AND MY PATIENCE IS LIMITED

I have been homeschooling now for five years. There are days when my head hurts, my two years old won’t stop screaming and if my eight years old drags himself across the floor when I tell him its time for school one more time, I may seriously snap! Just like any other mom, my patience is limited. My children know this and they will test my patience. Some days I can handle more and other days I want to throw in the towel and call it a day. It’s normal! No mom has perfect patience, some may be able to tolerate certain behaviors differently, but we are all human and we all have a limit to our patients. Yes, even a homeschool mom.

PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHERS HAVE LIMITED PATIENCE TOO

We get the impression that public school teachers must have more patience than us, but the truth is their patience is just as limited as yours and mine. They have certain behaviors and actions that will irritate them. Each teacher is able to tolerate certain behaviors differently. But, they all have a limit to their patients.

For example, my son’s kindergarten teacher put something negative in his agenda every single day. Little things like he was wiggling around in his chair. He was twirling his pencil. He was made to move his clip to red because he wouldn’t stop playing with his shoestrings during circle time.

She literally put him in ISS (in school suspension) for these things. At 5 years old.

Y’all to me these things were minor. And definitely didn’t deserve ISS. I would say her patience was very limited!

YOUR PATIENCE MAY BE LIMITED, BUT YOUR LOVE IS NOT

If you’re like most moms, you absolutely love your children. You have a love for your child that no other human on this earth could ever have.  Being frustrated when your children are misbehaving or not listening, is normal.  You may snap and even punish them, but you will kiss them goodnight at the end of the day and give them a fresh start tomorrow. You will stand up for them when they are in need, you will comfort them when they are in pain. Why? Because you love them. Because you want your child to succeed.

A PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHER HAS LIMITED PATIENCE AND LIMITED LOVE FOR YOUR CHILD

My oldest son was in public school for his first 5 years of school. So, I can say this. But, I do not mean a teacher is incapable of loving or caring for their students. I just mean that it’s limited. They will never have the same love for your child that you do. No one will. Never.

For example, I remember it like it was yesterday. Sitting in the office with my son’s 5th-grade teacher, the principle and the middle school guidance counselor. We were getting ready to transition him into middle school. My son did not have an IEP. He was diagnosed with ADHD and he had some auditory processing issues. This made it hard for him to comprehend things and he would only pick up bits and pieces of information and frequently zoned out in class. We had been fighting with the school system for 5 years and were told several times there was no testing available for him, no reading help (comprehending was his biggest issue).  He was in 5th grade and reading on a 3rd-grade level. This made every subject hard for him.

During this meeting, the middle school counselor said, “hey we also have testing available and other resources to help him”. Y ‘all I was on fire. I looked at his principle in the eyes and asked her why she had been lying to me about this for years. Why she told me there was no testing available to see if there may be other issues, why she told me there was no reading programs or afterschool programs to help him. She told me she never said that.

And you know what? His teacher had been in all the meetings. She knew everything, and during that meeting, she did not back me up. She did not stand up for my son.  They were perfectly ok with him failing.

This is the moment I realized that my husband and I were the only ones who really cared if he succeeded. We were the ones who would lose sleep at night worrying about him.  And I was the only one who could help him.

That is the moment I decided to homeschool. I was not going to throw him into middle school and watch the system continue to fail him.

Yes, my patience is limited and I’ve gotten frustrated plenty of times with my children to the point of tears, but I also have unconditional love for them. You and I, we are exactly the same. My patience is just as limited as yours. Just because I am a homeschool mom doesn’t mean I don’t lose my cool from time to time. Because I certainly do. I’ve just learned that we all have a limit to our patience even public school teachers, but the love I have for my children surpasses everything.